Barrier; anything that prevents progress; anything that separates or hinders union

STAY-AT-HOME PARENTS RETURNING TO THE PAID WORKFORCE

Welcome to Part One of our ‘Career Barrier Series’. Over the next few weeks, I plan to write about various career-related barriers.  The barriers will be quite varied and hopefully will assist you, the reader, to identify some hurdle you can personally relate to. 

Lets face it, many of us will be confronted with barriers throughout our life.  How we deal with these and how effective we are in personally overcoming these challenges, is more important than the barrier itself and why and how it came to be.     

I would like to highlight one particular scenario, of which I am frequently questioned on how to overcome:  A middle aged parent returning to the workforce after taking a career break to raise the children.  I would prefer not to be gender specific here but for the sake of this scenario, lets assume we are talking about Dad.  And not to get off track, but why do we call it a break?  No doubt Dad has been busy working, in the sense that he has been raising children, nurturing our future contributors to society, dealing with a range of issues such as health, education, spiritual and social needs, all while managing a home and often associated finances.  Why do we even label it a career break?  I feel exhausted even writing about it. Often this has been a choice, perhaps in some circumstances not a preferably one, but one which was necessary in order to maintain and meet the family’s needs, which were other than financial.  Yes, the family may have “done without” but are a sound and secure family unit for their choice.  In other situations, finances are not the core issue and the break has been planned into the entire workings of the family unit. 

Now, cut to 5 – 10 years later and Dad has decided to return to the workforce.  He has mastered the art of taking care of three busy little lives and suddenly finds himself with 5 hours per day in which he can only do so much housework and planning for the finances.  He begins to wonder what he used to be.  Perhaps he had a budding career, perhaps he has a degree, perhaps he has a talent of some sort which would easily be applied to any job.  Why do these very same competent people then come to me saying “But what do I put in my resume? I haven’t done anything for 10 years!”  Did you crawl into a cupboard and simply disappear for 10 years?  I myself, have been a stay-at-home mum.  I remember what it was like.  But I wasn’t doing………ahem, NOTHING!  Why do stay-at-home-parents devalue the very important job they are undertaking?  If you think you have been doing nothing and you present yourself on paper as having done nothing, then how can you expect a potential employer to see your worth.  Why is it so common for job hunters to only place value on the things they are paid to do.  A potential employer is interested in YOU and what YOU can do for their company – not just what you can do when paid.

Think about just what you have achieved while raising your children.  Stop and think about what you do on a daily basis – and I am not talking about paid work.  List those things and I am sure you will be surprised on just what you achieve day-in and day-out.    My husband and I are still in the process of raising six beautiful children aged 3 to 12 years.  It’s a team effort. While I work, my husband works too, but he is the stay-at-home parent or ‘Home Manager’ as I like to call him.  Just to make my point, I asked my amazing husband what he did on Friday and here is his list; dressed, fed and watered six children, made and packed lunches, drove the children to three different schools (preschool, primary and highschool), attended a school meeting, put on two loads of washing, folded washing, vacuumed and mopped the floors, mowed the lawns, cleaned the bathrooms, then did another school run and came home to prepare dinner.  Ok, so this may not be a typical day, everyday…….but this is what his day looks like most of the time.   

So the point is, explain your absence from the workforce.  Describe it as though it was a paid role!  And if you feel you have been overlooked for an opportunity, then the answer could lie in the way you market yourself.  If you feel you have ticked all the boxes and you have been unfairly assessed due to the gap in your career trajectory, then move on.  Others who do not understand the skills we develop whilst working in the position of ‘Home Manager’ are probably not worth convincing. 

I personally believe barriers are there to challenge and inspire us to become better people. Sometimes the barriers are downright unfair, and are put in place by people who are short-sighted.  Don’t take on this short-sightedness and allow it to damage your self esteem and self worth.  Allow these experiences to help you grow.  As an employer of ‘Mums-returning-to-the-workforce’ I can personally vouch for their skills, their commitment, their honesty and their worth as highly valued employees and often wonder if they would be the people they are today, if they hadn’t taken the time to be a full-time parent.©

Part 2 > continued ....